Nº. 1 of  11

Decolor sheet

Believe it or not; in every chapter in my story, there's something about you.

I Feel It Like You Do

Maybe I’m just scared

Those songs you’ve sent to me, you said I never know

You said I never understand

You said I never realise

I do,

I do.

I just don’t say it.

Baby I’m afraid you’ll see my scars

I feel it, I do.

I want you too, you just don’t see it.

It’s you, not me.

I miss you. I really do.

I know we can suck it up. I really do.

But sometimes I feel unsure about things we’ve been through. I hate the distance between us. We’re far apart. And I always keep waiting for the “one day”

I want you. You know I really do.

I’ve been in many relationships before you. And you know I suck at it, that’s why I have many relationship. If I was good at it, I would only have a few.

But after I met you, I just want to make it last. 

I always try to be faithful. I try to be good enough for you, so I’ll be worth to wait. Because I know you’re good for me.

But sometimes, I feel like you didn’t mean everything you’ve said.

I have a doubt that you don’t really want me.

Sometimes I feel like you never really mean it when you say I miss you.

My brain keeps telling me to let you go and move on, but my heart keeps telling me to stay and wait.

Sometimes I wish my brain and my heart were friends.

Sometimes I try to forget you and find another man so I don’t feel alone anymore. You know you’re not the only one who says I want you.

But deep down in my heart, I always always always feel like I really can’t let go. I want you.

The distance sucks.

I know right.

Every single night, I can’t sleep early because I always think about how it would be with you by my side. In the same bed. With me. Two of us.

I always hug my pillow, cry, and wish you were here with me. Or I was there with you.

I always think what would we do if you were with me.

I always think what the future hold for us.

They say, good things will come for those who wait.

And I’m waiting for you. I always will.

One day, when you’re finally done with your shit, you know where to go, because I won’t be anywhere but here.

I miss you.

Too soon

I was clearly happy and free before I meet this guy
But then I got happier and attached after I met him
I’ve never guessed if he could change my life goals
My whole life
I’ve never thought that I would put him into my plans
Right after he entered my life

I know it’s just too soon
And that’s the problem
I felt “that” weird feelings from the first time I saw him
It feels like we are already connected
He can easily read my mind, my feelings, my mood
That’s what I feel

I don’t really care “what” he is
I don’t really care how he looks
I don’t really care how far he is
I don’t really care those differences between us
I just care how he makes me feel comfortable and want him in my life and that’s all

Although I’m not sure what’s on his mind
He makes me waiting for him
He makes me wanting him
He makes me confused all the time
I can’t be so sure he wants me as much as I want him
Probably he does, but not for who I am,
Probably he does, for how I am

I want a guy who wants me really bad in his life
Not because I look attractive
Not because there are some guys who want me
But because he needs me for who I really am
For my bads and goods

Feeling needed and wanted, I love that shit
I want a serious relationship in my life
I’ve broke up for many times and that’s enough
I’ve never wanted to break up,
I always want to make it last, make it work
And my ego always ruins what I’ve built and now I promise to myself I won’t break it again

That’s just stupid how I always dream for a perfect prince who will make a perfect kingdom with me
I never make the first move, but when I like a guy, I like the guy
I don’t play “hard to get”
When you see I want you, I’ll keep showing you how bad I want you
And now I’ll say, I like this guy
So bad
Or, too bad.

Terrible Love - Cover by Birdy (The National)

 

It’s a terrible love
And I’m walking with spiders
It’s a terrible love and I’m walking in
It’s a terrible love
And I’m walking with spiders
It’s a terrible love and I’m walking in
It’s quiet company
It’s quiet company

It’s a terrible love
And I’m walking with spiders
It’s a terrible love that I’m walking in
It’s a terrible love
And I’m walking with spiders
It’s a terrible love that I’m walking in
It’s quiet company
It’s quiet company
It’s quiet company

And I can’t fall asleep
Without a little help
It takes awhile
To settle down
My shivered bones
Wait til the panics out

It takes an ocean not to break [x4]
Company
It’s quite a company
It’s quiet company

And I won’t follow you
Into the rabbit hole
I said I would
But then I saw
Your shivered bones
They didn’t want me to

It’s a terrible love
And I’m walking with spiders
It’s a terrible love and I’m walking in
It’s a terrible love and I’m walking with spiders
It’s a terrible love and I’m walking in

It takes an ocean not to break
It takes an ocean not to break
It takes an ocean not to break

(Source: terrore--sfregiato)

I do not trust people who don’t love themselves and yet tell me, ‘I love you.’ There is an African saying which is: Be careful when a naked person offers you a shirt.

 Maya Angelou

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The most painful thing is losing yourself in the process of loving someone too much, and forgetting that you are special too.

—Ernest HemingwayMen Without Women (via whitestamp)

She was filled with a strange, wild, unfamiliar happiness, and knew that this was love. Twice in her life she had mistaken something else for it; it was like seeing somebody in the street who you think is a friend, you whistle and wave and run after him, but it is not only not the friend, but not even very like him. A few minutes later the real friend appears in view, and then you can’t imagine how you ever mistook that other person for him.

—Nancy MitfordThe Pursuit of Love (via whitestamp)

I have a history of making decisions very quickly about men. I have always fallen in love fast and without measuring risks. I have a tendency not only to see the best in everyone, but to assume that everyone is emotionally capable of reaching his highest potential. I have fallen in love more times than I care to count with the highest potential of a man, rather than with the man himself, and I have hung on to the relationship for a long time (sometimes far too long) waiting for the man to ascend to his own greatness. Many times in romance I have been a victim of my own optimism.

Elizabeth GilbertEat, Pray, Love

What I want is to be needed. What I need is to be indispensable to somebody. Who I need is somebody that will eat up all my free time, my ego, my attention. Somebody addicted to me. A mutual addiction.

—Chuck Palahniuk, Choke

Nº. 1 of  11